Pre-Tour de France Checklist

1. Chalk inspiring message in Lance Yellow on sidewalk in front of house.
2. Get toenails and fingernails painted “maillot jaune” yellow.
3. Set up both daily Versus shows on DVR, adding 5 minutes to beginning and 30 minutes to end.
4. Clear DVR of extraneous broadcasts that may accidentally cause Tour not to tape properly.
5. Buy Dutch and Belgian Beer, and French wine to pair with each stage.
6. Visit Silver Lake Cheese for some cheese and baguette to go with it.
7. Research factoids to put in daily blogs; pull out DK Eyewitness Guide to France, and Wines of the World book.
8. Ride your bike and dance on the pedals like Contador, sprint like Cav, and look fierce like Levi.
9. Pull out yellow articles of clothing and plan outfits so loud that hapless others are forced to ask you, “What the heck is the deal with all the yellow, anyway?”
10. Practice your Bobke Roll hand gestures, and get ready to scream like a little girl!